Thursday, February 18, 2010

Gingerbread Cake

As my work has overflowed to Fridays, and along with some other factors, Chrissy now has assistance during the day for three hours, five days a week. We continue to have our Home Helpers' lady three days and have someone who is able to clean on the other two days. I wonder how long this will work, two different ladies. Each morning this week we have gone over and over who it is that's coming that afternoon. Yesterday Chrissy called to tell me she was sitting in her chair - just watching "what's her name" clean! Earlier they had gingerbread cake and coffee together. She loves to sit at the kitchen table and talk. I am so thankful there is money to cover her care, at least for now, and thankful that my father had planned well. Yesterday I ask her what she was having for lunch, wondering if she was eating what I set out. Nope, Chrissy was having gingerbread cake, and yes, this was before her helper arrived. That evening after I prepared dinner, she told me to put it in the refrigerator - she was having "ginger cake"! Cake as a meal, three times in one day. Oh my.

I have been thinking about the above phone conversation. I recall stories of how hard her life was as a child, growing up, I remember the large gardens she worked, and I can't even imagine raising seven children. So, she has help now, and Alzheimer's.

Mornings alone seem okay for Chrissy as it takes her hours to get dressed and moving around. Afternoons are different though as she will attempt to cook on her own - huge mess, burners on and all, or will wander outside or downstairs - not steady enough on her feet inside - fallen - steps and all - she isn't even steady inside, or gets lonely and starts calling me or my sweet man - repeatedly, or thinks she will take a Tylenol and gets a pain pill - really not good at all, or starts to look for something and pulls out whatever's in the drawers - I have to put it back when I come in because she's then too tired. All that's an overview, there is much more. She gets afraid when she's alone for more than three or four hours and her mind goes into that black hole. More so though, it's a safety issue.


Kerry said...

But she is at home! I wish I could have left Lily in her home except she was 4 states away. After 3 years she still does not consider our home her home. Safety issues and all leave her in her home as long as possible. That is where she will be the most content.

Oh Dear said...

When I went to college, I realized that I am now the adult and get to choose to eat dessert first OR for 3 meals a day.

donna_m_webb said...

There are people who really take issue when some of us refer to ourselves as the adult or the parent to our parent. But, what are we doing? We are taking care of our parent, all aspects of their life is in our hands. Their, safety, their happiness, comfort, basic needs cared for, isn't that what a parent does? They nurture and protect? When we moved in with mom, I set up a routine, becasue hers was out of sinc. But it was for our sakes to, so we could have some kind of normal daily routine in the midst of all this. That routine has changed many times over as the dementia has progressed, but I do still try to have some kind of structure to her caregiving, not that any of it matters to her at this point, but it does to me.

Lynn Cowell said...

Judy, Thanks for stopping by my blog. I have "Thin Places" in my basket next to my chair but haven't started it yet. Thanks for the reminder!